Human beings follow through on who they believe they are...
What that means is that if you think you're a certain type of a person. You become that person.
This is why someone saying "I'm a smoker, but I'm trying to quit smoking" - rarely ever actually quits.
Because they already labeled themselves as a smoker. Anything they say after that is redundant and not helping anyone.
Even if you set rules. Even you set boundaries. Even if you attempt to have the best discipline of your life... with thinking like that you're most likely going to fail.
Childhood beliefs
Thomas, a medical student. Lives in a small town in the US. When he was 15 he said to himself that he can't be an artist because it was too hard to sell.
And ever since he has stuck with that belief. He's 22 now. And still thinks the same.
Why? The reason behind that judgment is that he defined himself at a very young age. And he kept repeating it blinding every day since then. Unknowingly.
That's a really limiting belief. That we all have in some sense.
This kid conditioned himself since childhood. And if he doesn't look back at that decision and rethink the real reason why he made that choice. Why did he convince himself to that point?
He's going to stay that way forever. Unless he brings in a new mindset shift.
The Baby Elephant Story
You might have heard this already but it's a true fact about circus elephants that very much ties into this conversation right here...
Once upon a time, there was a baby elephant in a circus. The owner kept him tied to a small 5-foot rope. And tied the rope to a peg-top-shaped wood in the ground.
Since the elephant is tiny and weak. He can't really do much even if he tried with all his energy. But stay there until the owner decides to let him free.
As the baby elephant grows up... He conditioned himself into thinking that this peg is impossible to breakthrough.
He doesn't realize that his size has now grown up to this massive behemoth of a giant elephant. But because of the mindset... he will stay there his entire life - tied to that little peg. Even though he could break free any day he wanted.
How sad is that? But what's worse is that humans do this all the time...
Getting rid of limitations
Ask yourself whenever you have a limiting belief. Whenever you think you're not capable of doing something. Whenever you fail at something.
Ask yourself when did you decide that it's a strict hard NO? Which day was it when you made that decision that this is your limitation?
The real you shows up - when you take decisions instantly. Without thinking too much.
Standards
When you start to connect your true nature... Suddenly there's energy available for you to set higher standards for what you want in your life.
Think about your own life. I can bet $100 that there have been areas in your life where at some point in your lifetime... you completely shifted for the better.
And you raised the standards. And it completely changed your life.
"We live who we believe we are. - Tony Robbins"
Physical Body
Your physical body today is the perfect example of this.
It DOESN'T define:
- Your goals
- Your desires
- Your career path
BUT it rather defines - Your Standards.
Instead of setting goals like: Lose 5 KGs of weight.
Set a vision like: I'll get back to the best physique of my life.
Challenge yourself - constantly. And find ways to make that work.
Identity
Whatever it takes. Something's going to make you laugh, smile. Or tease you to another level.
If you start to identify yourself in a new way. A completely brand new polished way to living a fulfilled life.
And you own that identity every single day. Try your best to be as close to your ideal identity as possible.
And that becomes the standard of how you live. You will find ways to make that work. You will find ways to turn that into reality.
You have already done it
Now, this is the crazy part. What if I tell you that you have already raised your standards at certain points in your life.
Remember that time when you were the bread runner of the family. Even after losing your job - you found a way to get the financial situation going by selling bedsheets.
Yeah, that's an example. But you have done a similar thing before.
There's a point where you have no money to even buy a drink. And then your sister's college fees are due so you arrange something and get it paid. You took on a new job to pay those fees.
That is my friend - a great example of you raising your standards.
Lookback and I can assure you that you have already done it at least once.
Raise. Your. Standards.
Rituals
Alright. Real talk. You have tried to do this before. Set up certain rules for yourself and said I'll never do this again. Or I will go to the gym every single day.
But you failed. Many times.
Turns out you don't have strong enough reasons. You are unable to stay true to yourself. It's because you didn't have a strong desire backbone.
You didn't make that new standard REAL. That's where the power of rituals comes in.
You have to take on these huge challenges. Break them into daily bite-sized tasks.
This is also where I will have to mention the book "Atomic Habits" by James Clear.
Small Steps Daily = Drastic Results Long-term
It's too easy to succeed once you get this laid down perfectly.
Conclusion
I hope you take away something of value from this conversation.
This wasn't supposed to be a guide. This isn't a written description.
No. it's rather the best way to start moving your life to a Happy. Healthy. And fulfilled direction.
This is how you shift your mindset into a completely new direction. And bring the good change.
Go - Do the change.
Good Luck!
- Shubham Kushwah